It has been a couple of weeks since we booted the spectral
squatter from Erin’s basement.
In the meantime, the house has returned to a state of quiet
serenity (at least as far as spiritual entities are concerned) and I can walk
into the mudroom and stand on the stairs to the basement without wanting to
retch.
I’ve been attempting to recollect the exact chain of events
that occurred when we fire-and-pitchforked into the Murder Room, and it is
still kind of hazy. If Erin and Nate hadn’t been there, I might not be able to
remember enough to type this post. Whatever was down there must have had an
effect on me. While I was exorcising it, I was perfectly calm and collected.
For a couple of weeks before cleansing the basement, I had been having awful dizzy
spells, thanks to a combination of prescription medication that did weird
things to my blood pressure. But in the Murder Room, faced with the entity, I
was chill. No vertigo (I have a theory about that, which I mention near the end
of this post).
A lot went down in the Murder Room, enough that it daunts me
a bit to string together the episodes into story form. So here are the main
bullet points, as accurate as we can piece together:
- Enter basement.
- Immediately, the area feels heavy, hot, wet, dark, gross.
- Nate finds a central spot where the energy feels really
rough, I sage the shit out of it.
- Erin sees troughs of dirt along the upper foundation, and
I sage the shit out of that, too.
- The back corner is the worst, where the only original part
of the house remains – a brick chimney base.
- SAGE THE SHIT OUT OF IT.
- I set up my cauldron full of Morrigan incense (mixture courtesy
of Silver Ravenwolf) and my statue of Santisima Muerte.
- Nate confined the entity to the corner by the chimney.
- We noticed that there were some odd markings in paint on
the base stair, Nate and I realized they looked like the alchemical/shamanic
signs for “earth” and what looked to be a cross between “sun” and “salt.” We
decide to salt it, then throw salt in every corner.
- Nate drew the shamanic symbol for “fire” on the concrete
floor and outlined it with matches, setting a candle in the middle of the
symbol, and communicated with the ghost. Apparently it was really, REALLY
pissed, especially at me.
- I had given Erin a bell, and she waved it enthusiastically
in the direction of the spirit. Every time I invoked a deity or commanded the
spirit to leave, Erin would dangle the bell, saying, “And I have a BELL!” She
did a great job, for being an agnostic atheist.
- I thought that confronting the spirit with its own
mortality would scare it into leaving. I set my statue of La Santa Muerte in
front of it and tried talking to it. At one point I saw, in my mind’s eye, the
face of a man, shorter than me, about 5’6”, who was glaring at me with a
particular sense of loathing. I glared right back and it scoffed, turning and
sitting down by the chimney. Apparently this guy was all bluster, ego, and
mansplaining while alive. I toss salt in its face. Dean Winchester would be
proud of me.
La Santa Muerte Blanca
Durga Maa
The Morrigan by ByTheOak via deviantART
- Nothing seemed to be working. I invoked Morrigan, La
Santa, Durga, pick your badass feminine death deity; it just made the spirit
angry.
And then I tried something different, on a whim. Not even
thinking about it, I calmly began chanting the mantra to the bodhisattva Arya
Tara, who has been my go-to girl since I met her at the local Kadampa Buddhist
Center in 2011. It goes:
“Öm tare tuttare ture söha.” (“I prostrate to the Liberator,
Mother of all the Victorious Ones.”)
((I have included links to a couple of websites that has a
great explanation of the mantra, and how it serves to liberate beings from
samsara.))
Here’s a description from the Kadampa tradition:
“‘Tara’ means ‘Rescuer’. She is so called because she
rescues us from the eight outer fears (the fears of lions, elephants, fire,
snakes, thieves, water, bondage, and evil spirits), and from the eight
corresponding inner fears (the fears of pride, ignorance, anger, jealousy,
wrong views, attachment, miserliness, and deluded doubts).
Temporarily Tara saves us from the dangers of rebirth in the
three lower realms, and ultimately she saves us from the dangers of samsara and
solitary peace.”
Dayum.
After reciting the mantra, I had calmed down enough to
actually talk to the spirit instead of commanding it. I told it, resignedly,
that it needed to leave because it would not find any happiness by staying in
the house and harassing the occupants. Speaking gently but firmly, I advised it
to try and pass on. I was exhausted, and I could feel the entity in the corner,
no longer posturing or puffing itself up in defense, but pouting, as if it had
been given an earful to digest and was deciding what to do.
“I don’t think I can do any more here,” I sighed, gathering
my tools and walking upstairs with Erin.
“I’ve exhausted my arsenal and there
is only so much I can do as an officiant. It’s up to the spirit to make a
decision. And dammit, I’m tired.”
Tea followed. Lots of tea. Followed by a booze or two. I
went home and saged myself and my tools, took a spiritual bath, and conked out
in my bed, Trixy attendant. I went back to the usual dizziness, which caused me
to think that perhaps my deities or spirit guides were grounding me during the
exorcism so I could focus and stay safe. I probably couldn’t have remained calm
during the procedure if I was feeling all sorts of negative juju, and fear probably
would have made it stronger.
I spoke to my therapist about the encounter the next day,
and she mentioned that it made sense that the spirit responded to loving
kindness and not threats or aggression. Tara is the Buddha that people go to
for help. Her aspect of Green Tara is known as the Rescuer, or Liberator, and
it shows in her posture: She sits upon a lotus, with one knee bent in
contemplation and the other leg outstretched so that she can jump off of her
throne at any time and hurry to our rescue (she is also a wind element, hence
the speed!). In her puja, which is kind of like a Catholic liturgy, she is
described as being the one whom “evil spirits, demons, smell-eaters, and givers
of harm all offer praise.” Basically, girl is the OG and even nasty entities
respect her, because she cares about every sentient being and wants to help
them break free from the bondage of suffering.
According to the housemates, the spirit has not done
anything since the exorcism. In fact, it has buggered off. Murder Room has gone
back to being a basement. I recall, only now, that Nate had been communicating
with the entity some time before the cleansing, and he said that it was the
father of a family that had lived there in the past. There was also a mother
and a child, but the only one causing problems was the dad. It made sense that
he was harassing Erin, who is basically the house mother; perhaps she reminded
him of his wife. He seemed some sort of misogynist jerk, so it’s interesting
that a woman kicked his spectral ass.
Tara, you fucking rock, girl.
Arya Tara courtesy of Tharpa Publications
“Actually, we are also asking to be liberated from the
misery of the mental delusions and negative emotions that blind us to true
freedom, and to achieve the same enlightened body, speech and mind that Tara
represents, not only for our own benefit, but for the benefit of all sentient
beings.”
Blessed be, cats and kits.
Helpful links:
http://kadampa.org/buddhism/tara-puja